About Nirvana

What was the first name you wanted to name the baby?

Intruder

What is one of your earliest memories?

I was captured and hidden in a carport from the house mother for two weeks before being discovered by the whole household. By that time, they could no longer re-home me. Their house was mine.

What's the most trouble you've ever gotten in?

T'was only my "sibling" Pumpkin that caused the trouble.

Growing up, what did you think you wanted to do for a living?

For a living? Like a job? I am effortless. Everything I touch is mine and given to me. That is what I want.

What is something you always wanted to do but didn't and why?

Take over the world.

Was there something your parents did when you were a kid that you swore you’d never do yourself?

Like the dog Sapphire. I mean, I don't like her!

Was there something your parents did you want to emulate?

Nothing. I do what I want.

Who were/are your role models? Who did you look up to when you were younger? Who do you look up to now?

Kurt Cobain

What’s the best trip you’ve ever taken?

I once escaped my castle onto a city patio to live the high life. To my dismay, no one noticed I left them! Their queen!!!! I wallowed all night trying to stake claim to all belongings across the apartment line to no avail. It was only my best trip after seeing the deep regret and horrifying looks on the home peasants facing when discovering I made my escape and waiting impatiently for them to open the door in the morning. #Rude

What was your wedding day like?

I don't need no man!

What do you want or wish most for your kids?

That they know their place. This is my house.

What were some of your biggest struggles or insecurities in high school?

Nothing. I was never insecure.

What would your perfect day be like? Describe it.

All the pate canned food I desire. Salmon only. Chicken is for peasants.

Is the present year anything like you imagined it would be when you were growing up?

Yes. Everyone has now realized that they should be home every day basking in my presence. My dreams have come true. No one goes anywhere.

What advice would you give to your younger self at age 13? 20?

Own it.

Who will be the stricter parent, you or Sam?

Melissa.

What was your favorite food as a child?

Bugs. Mmm that crunch.

What was your least favorite food as a child?

Garlic!

What was your first word?

@#*&$!

What was your favorite stuffed animal, and what was its name?

Tiger